Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Flourish

The first time I had a panic attack I was sitting in my room in the house I grew up in at 14 years old watching What Not to Wear. Nothing really prompted it. It came over me like a deep, dark wave of suffocation, and I had no idea what was happening inside my body. This was before Google was popular, so I couldn't really search my symptoms. These terrible things happened to me continuously for years. They have stolen much of my life and my joy I feel. I desperately prayed for a solution.. For the Lord to take them from me. I would go up to the altar at church weekly as a teen pleading to God. I thought I had some kind of asthma or lung defect, because it felt like I could never catch my breath, and I lived in a constant state of fear of having another one. Some days I would have panic attack after attack. When someone is experiencing a panic attack, their body is responding to a fearful thought or stressor by placing itself in a state of fight or flight. It's actually trying to help you stay alive. It's a very simple system in our bodies. If we saw a tiger standing in front of us in the jungle, our body would go into fight or flight, pumping adrenaline through us to either fight the tiger of flee away from it. People who live with anxiety have an imaginary tiger that the body is responding to in the same way. It doesn't know that there is no real danger. I have lived with these since then, sometimes having more "calm" seasons. I have tried many things that are supposed to help, and none of them have helped me. . Fast forward to 3 years ago after having my daughter. I was on anti-anxiety medicine, and my panic attacks had become worse than ever. I have tried several meds for it in my life, and none helped me, personally. When Addy was 8 months old, we got her her first flu shot (not getting into all of that), and she became ill and stayed ill (ear infection, colds, flu) for several months. I began looking into natural remedies, because I felt completely helpless and wanted some control back in my life (another personality trait of someone with anxiety). I wanted to help her. I began looking into essential oils, and I have to maintain compliance, so I will simply say, they helped her wellness tremendously. Because they helped her so much in many different ways, I wanted to try them for myself and my emotions. I bought my first YL starter kit and fell in love with the oils. I became a part of Our Essential Life when I bought my kit, and I have learned so much about health from this resource. It gave me a thirst for knowledge in understanding the body and mind. Side note: Dr J (my Dr I see now.. I'll get there) founded and runs OEL. She's brilliant and has an amazing track record and reputation for helping people achieve and maintain health for over 20 years. End side note. My episodes did not completely stop from using the oils alone, but they helped me tremendously once an event started. Fast forward again to the end of my pregnancy with August last year. Without disclosing everything we have been through in the past year or so... Everyone has a "hard"... Chris did get laid off 2 months before my due date with him. Other "certain" jobs fell through, and it was a very stressful time in our lives. We weren't really using the oils much during that time because we were about to have a baby, and we were broke. Chris got his old job back at Goodrich after August came along, and I decided I wanted to start using the oils more regularly since I was experiencing a lot of unwelcome emotions after having him. The oils did help a ton, but I needed more help, to get to the root of the issue. I contacted Dr J after experiencing some very dark weeks, and she spoke with hope that she could help me. We decided to make my health a priority and book an appointment with her. She ran several tests, and the next appointment she sat me down in a room showing me my results and began explaining to me how the gut and brain are directly linked. That when we are only a few weeks old in the womb, our stomach creates our brain. I knew these things, but I loved hearing her explain it. In fact, I was pretty star struck because I had only seen her in videos and through Facebook posts. I may not have heard most of the things she was saying from my state of struckness and my children hanging off of all my limbs simultaneously. In her nutrition appointments, she told me what oils and supplements (Standard Process has my ❤️) my body needs support with to get back to a state of wellness. She also wanted me to take the plunge I had considered taking for years and stop eating foods that were damaging my body, and therefore my mind. I did so and also began cleaning up my environment, replacing everything in my home and things I put on our bodies. It was actually really fun being able to find natural solutions for all of the chemicals we were using (Thieves cleaner replaced most beautifully). Soy, wheat, corn, and sugar were my focal eliminations with food. In cutting these out, you pretty much eliminate most processed foods. I'm working on dairy now for skin issues. We all know sugar is bad for us, but you may not know why the other 3 are. They (and the products from them.. Think corn starch, soybean oil or vegetable oil) are genetically modified. Our bodies do not know how to process them. Wheat Belly is a good resource to start with on learning about these things. They are damaging to our gut, liver, and brain, amongst other systems. When the gut is being damaged, the brain is being affected. Do a search for gut health and symptoms. How do essential oils assist all this? There are oils that support gut health, and oils clean receptor sites, which in turn make sure that all of our systems are communicating properly. So, oils, combined with diet/environmental changes, and chiropractic care are helping me, when nothing else has in the past. I noticed a huge change in my moods the first month. I didn't have a single attack. I have been devoted to this food journey since January (Trim Healthy Mama has delicious recipes that help me stick with it). I do still have days where I feel more anxious and emotional than others, but my body still has a LOT of healing to do. Plus.. Life. Emotional Freedom Technique (tapping) with Release oil helps me greatly when I do still have moments. It's a wonderful tool! When I start feeling my stress levels rising, I sniff oils like Peace and Calming or Stress Away for preventative measures. I feel hope and joy again. I feel like I'm beginning to "Flourish" for the first time in my life. I love teaching others what I have learned. I hope it can help others. I pray it can. I have had many people along the way mistake my passion for judgment that they don't do things the way I do, and that's not the case at all. We have all been given different paths and trials to walk through. Life is hard enough without all of that. I share my story in hopes that it has answers for someone else. My Dr likes to say, "if there is something you don't like, change it." Our bodies want to function beautifully, we just have to give them the right assistance. Keeping this in perspective with Christianity, I am not trying to prolong my life, but I desire to be able to use my body to serve the Lord. Living with crippling anxiety makes serving others nearly impossible, and that is unacceptable. I choose joy and peace and to use my body for the glory of the Lord. This is the answer to my prayers. I know the Lord has led me to this journey. He is always faithful, even when our prayers aren't answered the way we would like.